Lisa Ray’s Message To Men About Menopause

MUMBAI-Actress and cancer survivor Lisa Ray has opened up about entering marriage while navigating the effects of menopause, reflecting on how not fully understanding the changes in her body affected the early years of her relationship.

Lisa revealed that she underwent chemo-induced menopause at 37 after high-dose chemotherapy as part of her treatment for multiple myeloma. She later met and married her husband at 40, while still experiencing the effects of menopause.

The ‘Four More Shots Please!’ actress said that with a better understanding of what was happening in her body, she might have navigated the early years of her marriage differently.

Lisa shared what she called an “unofficial husband’s guide” to loving and supporting a woman through perimenopause and menopause.

“A very unofficial husband’s guide to loving a woman through perimenopause and menopause. I went into chemo-induced menopause at 37. I met and married my husband at 40. Entering marriage while experiencing the aftermath of menopause was…interesting. No wonder those first few years were volatile. Had I understood what was happening in my body, I might have thrown my husband a life raft,” she wrote.

“Gold star, baby. But jokes aside, I wish more men understood this: we are not broken and we don’t need fixing. Perimenopause can be long, exhausting and disorienting. Our resilience can be lower than usual, and sometimes the smallest things can feel like the last straw. So, guys, here’s a little guide to not just surviving it, shutting down or gaslighting your partner, but learning to walk beside her through it.”

In her guide, Lisa urged partners to understand that mood changes can be part of the experience and not immediately take every reaction personally. She advised them to listen rather than always try to fix a problem and to give women space without making them feel abandoned.

She also pointed to sleep disruption, exhaustion and brain fog, while cautioning partners against using menopause as a reason to dismiss a woman’s feelings.

“Don’t take every mood personally and equally, don’t use menopause as a convenient excuse to dismiss her feelings. Both things can be true,” she wrote. “DO NOT say ‘calm down.’ This is not a survival strategy.”

Lisa stressed that the people closest to someone often see the most unfiltered side of them and said relationships require patience and understanding as both partners adjust.

“It’s the ones closest to us that get the unedited version because they are home. That doesn’t mean they should become punching bags. It means we have to learn a new way of being with each other. To the men navigating this alongside us: thank you for staying in the room. Even when you may occasionally need a helmet. Here’s to us meno-survivors and to the men who love us.” (IANS)